Damiana aphrodisiac: the old Mexican love tea

Here's a herb with serious seduction credentials. Spanish missionaries in Mexico wrote about local people sweetening damiana tea with sugar and drinking it to encourage desire and lovemaking. Centuries later it's sold as a liqueur in a curvy bottle said to be shaped like a woman's body. Subtle it is not, at least in the marketing.

Botanically it's Turnera diffusa, a small shrub with yellow flowers and aromatic, slightly serrated leaves. It grows wild across Mexico, Central America and the Caribbean, often on dry, rocky hillsides. The leaves are the part people use, and crushing them releases a warm, sweet scent somewhere between chamomile, fig and dried herbs, with a faintly bitter edge.

Unlike the herbs sold as powerful stimulants, the damiana aphrodisiac reputation is a soft one. Think of a fragrant, relaxing cup that helps you slow down, feel warm and get more open to being touched. In herbal shops it's usually sold as dried, chopped leaf, and it keeps well in a sealed jar away from light.

Damiana has been used in Mexico and Central America for centuries, not just for love but for coughs, low mood and tiredness. Its reputation as a love herb travelled north in the late 19th century, when it became fashionable in the United States and Europe as a tonic for the nerves and for flagging vigour.

It turned up in plenty of patent medicines of that era, and its claims were exaggerated enough to attract regulators' attention. Even so, the damiana aphrodisiac legend survived, helped along by the famous Mexican liqueur and its very suggestive bottle. Some people insist the original margarita was made with damiana liqueur, though that story is more charming than proven.

Today damiana sits on the shelves of herbalists, tea shops and online stores, usually marketed for relaxation and romance. It's one of those plants whose reputation has outrun the science by a long way, which is exactly why it pays to look at what we really know before you brew your first cup.

Damiana contains a mix of flavonoids, essential oils, tannins and other plant compounds. One of those flavonoids, apigenin, is also found in chamomile and has mild calming effects in lab studies. That may explain why so many people describe the main damiana effects as soothing, warm and gently mood lifting.

Some researchers have suggested damiana might improve blood flow or influence nerve signalling in ways that support arousal, but that idea comes mostly from test tube and animal work. It's interesting rather than established. Animal studies also hint at mild anti-anxiety effects, which would fit its reputation, but human data is very thin.

The likeliest explanation is simple and still useful. Arousal depends heavily on feeling safe, relaxed and unhurried, especially if your mind races at bedtime. A warm, fragrant drink you expect to feel sensual can cue your body to let go of the day. When you stop thinking about emails, it's a lot easier to notice how good a slow kiss feels.

Most of the science behind the damiana aphrodisiac claim comes from rats. Several studies found that extracts made sluggish or sexually exhausted male rats more interested in mating. That's intriguing, but rats aren't people, and it doesn't tell us much about human desire on a Friday night after a long week.

In humans, the evidence is indirect. Damiana has been included in multi-ingredient supplements alongside things like ginseng, ginkgo and L-arginine, and some trials of these blends found improvements in women's sexual desire and satisfaction. Because the products contained several ingredients, nobody can say how much damiana itself contributed. It may have helped a lot, or hardly at all.

So the fair verdict on damiana benefits is this. It has a long tradition and some promising animal research, but no strong human trials show it raises libido on its own. If you enjoy it and it helps you relax into sex, that's a perfectly good reason to use it. Just don't expect it to work like a prescription.

Damiana has long been associated with women's pleasure, and it often appears in blends marketed for female desire. That fits its gentle, relaxing character. For many women, desire is responsive rather than spontaneous. It shows up once things start to feel good, so anything that helps you switch off and settle into your body can help the warm-up along.

Try it as part of a slow evening ritual: a cup of tea, a warm bath, soft lighting and no rush. Pay attention to how your body feels rather than whether you're turned on yet. Arousal often builds quietly, through skin, breath and attention, until you realise you're wet and wanting more.

If low desire, vaginal dryness or pain during sex is a regular issue, damiana for women isn't a substitute for proper help. A GP, sexual health clinic or menopause specialist can look at hormones, medications and other causes. Herbs can be a lovely extra, but you deserve real answers too.

The classic way to enjoy damiana is as a tea. Use one to two teaspoons of dried leaf per cup of freshly boiled water, cover it and let it steep for 10 to 15 minutes. Covering it keeps the fragrant oils in your mug rather than letting them float off with the steam.

• add honey or a little agave to soften the bitterness
• drop in a strip of orange peel or a cinnamon stick
• blend with rose petals or chamomile for a softer cup
• mix with lemon balm for an extra calming evening tea
• stick to one or two cups in the evening

Smell the leaf before you brew. Good damiana is fragrant and green-brown, not dusty and odourless. Stale leaf makes a flat, bitter cup and is often why people decide the herb doesn't suit them. Prefer something else? Tinctures and capsules are available, and a small glass of the liqueur is a fun treat.

Most people describe the damiana aphrodisiac effect as subtle. Within half an hour to an hour, you might feel more relaxed, warm and present. Some notice a light sense of wellbeing, a bit like the first sip of wine without the alcohol. It doesn't cause a sudden rush of arousal, and you shouldn't expect it to.

Effects vary a lot. Some people feel noticeably relaxed after one cup, while others feel almost nothing. Try it on a quiet evening first, with no plans and no pressure, so you learn how it affects you before making it part of a date night. A herb you've tested is far easier to enjoy than one that surprises you.

Old herbal books sometimes claim damiana is mildly euphoric when smoked. There's little evidence for that, and smoking any herb is bad for your lungs, so stick to tea or tincture. You want to be breathing heavily for the right reasons. Keep it in the mug, where it tastes and works best.

Most of the animal research on damiana was done in male rats, and the herb was sold as a tonic for flagging male vigour in the 19th century. So yes, men drink it too. There's no good evidence that it improves erections in humans, but the same relaxing, mood-setting effect works whatever your body looks like.

For men who struggle with performance anxiety, a calm, unhurried evening can make a bigger difference than any pill. A cup of damiana, a slow start and a partner who knows there's no pressure to perform can help you stay present rather than stuck in your head. Arousal is much easier when you're not watching yourself.

If erections are a regular problem, though, see a GP rather than relying on herbal tea. Erection trouble can be an early sign of heart or blood vessel disease, and effective treatment is easy to get. Damiana belongs in the treat category, not the treatment category. Enjoy it for what it is.

Damiana is generally considered safe in normal tea amounts for most healthy adults, but it hasn't been well studied, so a little caution makes sense. Very large doses have been linked in old reports to unpleasant symptoms such as agitation, so stick to normal amounts and don't double up with high-dose capsules.

Avoid it in pregnancy and while breastfeeding, as there's no reliable safety data. Some research suggests damiana might lower blood sugar, so people with diabetes or on blood sugar medication should check with a doctor first and watch their levels. If you're having surgery, stop it a couple of weeks beforehand.

Go easy on the liqueur. A small glass can be lovely, but alcohol in larger amounts dulls arousal and makes erections and orgasms harder to reach. Damiana side effects are rare at sensible doses, but too much booze will spoil the night faster than any herb can save it.

Brew a pot of damiana tea, dim the lights and put your phones in another room. The ritual matters as much as the herb. It tells both of you that this time is for each other. Start with slow kissing and a massage with warm oil, and let your hands wander without rushing to the main event.

Make a game of anticipation. Agree on twenty minutes of touch with no genitals allowed, then see who cracks first. Whisper what you'd like to do next, or ask your partner what they want and do exactly that. Teasing is one of the most reliable ways to get turned on, with or without a damiana aphrodisiac tea in hand.

Flying solo? A warm cup before a bath or a lazy evening with your favourite toy is a lovely way to shift out of busy mode. Whatever your relationship looks like, use the damiana aphrodisiac ritual as an invitation to relax and enjoy yourself, with no pressure for anything to happen. Desire tends to arrive when you stop chasing it.